|
|
Tuesday, May 20th, 2008
| |
11:28 am - yesterday's cotton underwear and your favorite blue shirt
|
the night i left, i ran my fingertips over every part of your face in an effort to memorize it.
it was then that i realized
there is not a single ugly thing about you.
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Thursday, May 8th, 2008
| |
1:53 pm
|
|
| Sunday, March 16th, 2008
| |
10:44 pm - selective seclusion
|
|
| Thursday, November 29th, 2007
| |
1:18 pm
|
one of my professors told me at the beginning of the semester that college would drain every drop of creative energy i once had.
i now believe her entirely.
current mood: king arthur
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, November 12th, 2007
| |
10:14 pm
|
i just turned off all the lights in my room and i'm burning an orange candle and playing norwegian wood on repeat as loud as my shitty ipod headphones can go. i can only hope that if i drown out my senses, my emotions will finally catch up with the rest of me. i spend a lot of my time walking outside with these same headphones attached to me, if not just to drown out the sounds of college life, to sort of serve as a good friend for the time being. i walk with my head down. if i accidentally make eye contact, i give an awkward smile and keep walking.
is it possible to be nostalgic and apathetic at the same time?
current music: 9
|
|
(3 comments | comment on this)
|
| Thursday, July 19th, 2007
| |
12:01 am
|
lately when i dream, i've been standing somewhere up high. the sun is setting on a rooftop or a mountain or someplace with a view. i'm hanging my laundry and there's a tall, barefoot boy behind me with a beard and a t-shirt and an acoustic guitar and he's singing really softly about cold beaches and wine.
it's not warm and we drink our coffee black and tangle our legs together and whisper about the lives of the people flying in planes above us.
it's something that's as far from sad as i've ever known.
current mood: driving
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Monday, March 5th, 2007
| |
9:39 pm
|
it seems like everybody i know is trying to cure or prevent their insanity by participating in talk therapy or taking antidepressants.
i, personally, have never been so close to shaving my head.
i bought a red leather notebook yesterday, i think i'll start writing in that.
i have a lot of feelings.
current mood: dead
|
|
(3 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, February 19th, 2007
| |
9:37 pm
|
i drove home tonight with my windows down and my heat broken and i sang our songs from the summer, and for the first time in months, i felt invincible.
it's all falling back into place.
part of me expected my recent lack of contentment to linger, but part of me knew that my mild bout of winter depression would melt with the snow and the end of the speech season.
i have a few weeks before either of those are gone for good, but i can't wait. there's nothing better than the first warm night of the year, when you can drive with your windows down and sleep with your windows down and play the sanguine music that winter won't allow.
i should start sleeping more. it should be easy now that the weight of the world is off my shoulders.
and i'm pretty sure i'm in love.
current mood: hell yes wichita
current music: samson
|
|
(7 comments | comment on this)
|
| Thursday, February 8th, 2007
| |
6:43 pm
|
i feel like my life will either begin or end on february 17.
current mood: sick dude
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Monday, December 18th, 2006
| |
10:47 pm
|
i really do love you, and talking to you every once in a while would be nice. you and everybody thinks i'm depressed when really i'm just exceptionally worn out. with standards and everything, it's hard to keep up. remember summer? i ask you that a lot. you say yeah, and you usually smile and shake your head and look at the ground like you always do when i talk in circles. like now, now you would be shaking your head.
yesterday an old dark woman saw me crying in my car at a stoplight and she held up her hand and smiled at me, which made me cry harder because i shouldn't have even been crying in the first place when i'm surrounded by people holding up their hands at me and smiling.
i went to the library by myself this afternoon, and even though i didn't shower today, i felt like the cleanest person there. and i've been doing a lot of community service lately for no real reason, and that makes me feel clean in a different way.
current mood: ugly
|
|
(14 comments | comment on this)
|
| Thursday, November 23rd, 2006
| |
10:22 am
|
|
| Monday, November 13th, 2006
| |
10:30 pm
|
usually i'm so cliche about these kinds of things, but right now i'm feeling kind of groggy and lumpy and i want winter to just dissolve into spring, but it aches when i think about the dozens of extemp speeches i have yet to write this season and how it's my last extemp season ever and in less than nine months i won't call this section of ohio home anymore.
then i get to thinking about all my complicated relationships and how organized they really are in the back of my twisted little mind and how i manage to organize my twisted little mind into areas like i organize my emails.
life, college, speech, school.
i have a constant stomachache.
and today's my seven month anniversary.
current mood: poop
|
|
(10 comments | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, September 24th, 2006
| |
10:10 pm
|
i don't normally ask for things, but i have a personal request.
i need cassettes. mix tapes, favorite albums on cassette, anything! just good music on tape.
since my 1987 ford escort doris rolled into my life a month ago, i've been listening to nothing but NPR and bad 80s mix stations. this week, as a birthday gift, she's getting a tape deck put in! so exciting.
please, as a special birthday favor? for my seventeenth and doris' twentieth.
peace, love, and aural pleasure,
katie
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Sunday, July 16th, 2006
| |
12:17 am
|
sometimes now
i use four letter words i never believed in
body and body
but more feeling than anything
i've been burned by the spark that lights your eyes
i do follow you
patient
wrapped up in invisible ribbons
my hands are tied
tied to your hands
i'll tell you all of this
when i can remember to breathe
current mood: el niño
current music: billy corgan
|
|
(11 comments | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, May 7th, 2006
| |
10:08 am
|
we found a new kind of dance in a magazine
tried it out its like nothing you've ever seen
current mood: best weekend ever
|
|
(10 comments | comment on this)
|
| Friday, April 28th, 2006
| |
8:31 pm
|
|
| Sunday, August 28th, 2005
| |
12:07 pm
|
|
| Monday, August 8th, 2005
| |
1:15 pm - haaaha i'm wearing the same shirt in all of these pictures.
|
|
| Thursday, June 2nd, 2005
| |
6:50 pm
|
|
| Tuesday, May 10th, 2005
| |
6:06 pm
|
you and i were lying in a twin bed without blankets and a bowl between us and i asked you what you thought of me. "when it rains, you're the only person i know who takes her jacket off," you said, "and when you kiss me, you hold your hands at the weakest part of my neck, like you're saving me from something."
current mood: another one
|
|
(5 comments | comment on this)
|
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
ispillalot's journal
